Had a good day with someone

a good day today. Enjoyed it a lot. Did feel I lived for the moment.

Had a sense of achievement/accomplishment this morning when I finished a few 'tasks':
1) Saw the GP - same as before, he didn't offer much to me; but he seemed to be a bit nicer and asked me to do the blood test in 4 weeks. Maybe because I didn't push him as much and so he tried to be nice too?

2) Transferred money between accounts in different banks; got to the YBS with my passbook to deposit my cheque - oh, I did feel a bit excited to go to the bank with my passbook.

3) Paid an electricity bill at the post office for the first time! Though money's gone...

4) Did gym for about 40 mins! Having not gone to gym for a few days, I obviously had enough energy to do it. Did feel my legs are a bit fat but I'm happy that I get a bit healthier than before...

Had lunch at McDonalds!! Oh, I had been feeling like going to McDonalds over the past few days. Don't know why. Just felt like it. But I tried to save 'quota' by not having McDonalds till today! And I enjoy big lunch for £2 only because of the vouchers I got! Good job to myself!

Nice lunch helped start the afternoon with a good mood. Felt relaxed back home. Did a bit of work on the anthology and also some 'creative' writing! Also, finally Uncle Sunny has come back to us today!

Had a very nice time with someone in the evening. Had dinner at Samsi. Yummy! Being able to spend time with someone you like is luxury and that's why I was happy to have that chance today.

This was the 2nd day I didn't take medicine for my stomach. I do feel worried if my stomach problems come back. It seems my stomach was unwell in the past two evenings - a bit of that kind of pain and some sort of acid reflex? :(  When can my stomach get back to 'normal'?

Psychological or physical illusion?

A lot to take in today...

First the ACCA class... The tutor of today's class was always strict about attendance thing. She didn't want anyone to 'cheat', so every time when we signed the register, she'd count the number of people in the class. Because someone signed on behalf of another person who was not in, she had to check against who was actually in the class; then a couple of people left the class during the break, she checked again! What a mess! Also, I started not liking those male Pakistani classmates, maybe because they always chat chat chat, and laugh and don't look serious about their studies? Anyway, today's class was the last tuition class for this paper and I felt a bit relieved when the class finished, since I can have a one week break! Of course that also means I should spend time on revisions...

No gym again. Be a 'si lai' again by doing food shopping - buy food to make weekly soup! Really had headache about what soup to make as I have very little knowledge about Chinese soup. It seems I still have to do food shopping at least twice a week. Last Saturday I just bought some fruit & vegetables and today I had to buy some more! No wonder I seem to be gaining weight...

I found that there was a lot of traffic at the city centre, especially on the roads to my flat (e.g. Trinity Way, Chapel Street, Bridge Street), between 4 and 6 p.m. on weekdays!

Finished the medicine for my stomach yesterday, which means today I didn't take any medicine for my stomach. Not sure if it's psychological or physical effect, I do feel my stomach was not really as good again... Maybe I'm just so worried that those symptoms will come back. I did feel a sudden pain around my stomach, chest, back, etc. but I'm not sure if it's just a psychological thing. I do believe my body does signal something to me when I 'over-work' it... Got an appointment with GP tomorrow morning. As before, I dare not expect much. I do have a bit of fear of seeing that GP again. Feel like I'm a crazy patient in front of him!

*****

Lunch: home-made again, having fried rice with bacon & nuts, broccoli & mushroom, and sausage roll

snack: banana & biscuits again!

Dinner: pasta with chicken & spinach in soup (I made soup tonight!)

Oh, someone distributed leaflets to our door. Attached to the leaflets was McDonalds vouchers!! Yeah!

poor weather, poor day?

Oh today looked a bit gloomy like the weather!

I woke up around 7 a.m., as I wanted to do a bit of work on the anthology and also I had to make lunch for my lunchbox. I did manage to make my lunch but didn't really do much on the anthology. And I missed a bus which ended up me being late for class again! I also forgot to bring my calculator for the class and spoon & fork for my lunch - I went to McDonalds during lunchtime to get two lollipop sticks (which are normally used for stirring drinks) in order to have my lunch!

Was thinking of going to gym after class but decided not to go as I carried so many things (lunchbox, water bottle, folder..) and the weather was not nice. I still had that numbness feeling in my upper right back, which I suspected may have to do with me often carrying heavy bags on my right shoulder and sitting in a wrong posture! So I think I better be nice to my right shoulder & back by trying not to carry too many heavy things! Also stomach seemed to be a bit 'naughty' today with a bit of pain coming back :(

I finished reading the book 'Never let me go' by Kazuo Ishiguro. It's actually a bit sad story, especially when I read the latter parts in which, for example, the two main characters can't get together, and the characters have to follow the fate as it's arranged, etc. Suddenly I miss someone... oh, there's actually a film version of the book http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Never_Let_Me_Go_(2010_film) & http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXiRZhDEo8A

Oh when does Uncle Sunny come back to us?

*****

Lunch: 'vegetarian Monday' - rice with fried tofu, sweet potato & broccoli

Note: there's also a banana & biscuits as my afternoon snack! 

Dinner: shallow fried pasta with broccoli, mushroom, egg & cashew nuts

Had a good rest!

Being lazy at home. Was a bit 'hardworking' in the morning when I did laundry and cleaned the kitchen & shower room. Had a 2-hour nap in the afternoon after lunch! Actually didn't sleep enough last night as I stayed up till 1:30 a.m. and my flatmate switched on the washing machine for her clothes, which made a bit of noise; then this morning someone woke up at 7:30 a.m. and turned on music/radio! Anyway, had a good afternoon nap since the flat was so quiet... 

It's actually good for me to have a rest today at home, having had classes for 4 days this week! Was supposed to work hard on the anthology that I had promised the professor to finish this week but again didn't feel like doing it, probably because once I started it, I had to spend hours finishing it... 

*****

My lunch: baked beans (finally I finished the whole can!) + broccoli with bacon + rice with sausage roll

the combination of rice and sausage roll is good! 

My dinner: chicken & mushroom pie (as I wanted to finish it!) + sausage roll + broccoli with mushroom + boiled sweet potato 

Oh, I love sweet potato! Its sweet! The pie was a bit dry. Sausage roll was yummy! 

That's what we call 'life'!

Had a good day today (Saturday)! The weather was not nice though - sunny at the beginning, then turned into heavy rain with strong chilly wind!

Good things for today include:
1) I got a cheque from city council - I'm not sure about what it's for but I guess it's probably kind of remittance for my overpayment of council tax for the previous financial year!

2) Had frappuccino at half price at Starbucks with my Jeff & Boh! Not having coffee with them for a while. Used to do that with them and Jane Jane who's back to Malaysia! :(  I chose caramel light frappuccino. Tasted ok. I was a bit worried about my stomach as the drink was coffee and cold, which doesn't seem to be good for stomach. Fortunately I seemed to be ok with the drink. I wanted to choose either 'chocolate cream' or 'mocha' frappuccino but I had checked that both of them were too sugary and of high calories...

3) Someone gave me a lift back home. Because the ticketing machine was out of order, we got 'free' parking!

4) Had home-made dinner with my best 'chocolate' tonight. Healthy and tasty dinner, I'd say! haha! Nice evening. :)

5) Did my food shopping today! I got a lot of healthy & favourite food including fruit and vegetables! Almost tempted to get crunchy peanut butter (suddenly feel like having bread with peanut butter! Maybe want a change for breakfast) & some crunchy cereals at Aldi. May get them next time!

How good it is if life's like today! Just some little things can make a good day and cheer us up!

*****

My home-made lunch

My caramel light frappuccino! (tasted ok)

Jeff had 'double coffee caramel frappuccino' while Boh had 'tazo green tea frappuccino' (though at the end he had to change it for 'caramel light frappuccino as the green tea tasted a bit awkward...)

Home-made dinner - steamed seabass, fried egg with bacon & mushroom, and broccoli

I love burgers!

It was what people call 'Black Friday'. But it's just a 'label' that people gives it and it doesn't necessarily mean it'd be very bad! Anyway, ACCA class again today. And like yesterday, I brought with me home-made lunch. I got up early to make the lunch! I started to like bringing lunchbox again as it's more healthy and it saves me money! And I like to use my lovely lunchbox (princess). I seem to have eaten a lot today. During the break in the morning, I can't help having some biscuits. Then after class, I had a banana. I may not really feel hungry but just felt like eating something!

Got a good 'surprise' this evening. Someone came out to town for some reasons and had dinner with me at GBK again!! Oh!! :) We printed out the '2 for £10 burger' voucher again and enjoyed a very nice burger dinner and chat! I've become a burger person this month! Last week I had burgers (outside and at home) 5 days in a row. Then this week I had burgers for 3 days already! Ha, don't know why I can eat so many burgers without feeling tired of them! Some time ago I was in love with fish and chips, now it's burgers' turn! Yummy!

*****

My lovely home-made lunch: rice + fried tofu with bacon & cashew and broccoli

(simple but tasty and healthy)

Dinner: GBK burgers - Avocado Bacon & Jamaican

Chips (burgers must go with chips) + ginger & lemon grass + elderflower drinks

Is being jobless = lazy?

Another ACCA class today. Then gym & bought crumpets & broccoli from Aldi. Still not in the mood. Lots of things in my mind. When I was in class, while I was trying to listening to what the tutor said, I was also somehow thinking about why I did that study, why I had a bad dream last night (oh, last night's dream was really not nice and I felt scared then), why I was not happy, what I should do in my future, what I had forgotten to do, what I was going to have for dinner and for tomorrow, whether I should get online, etc.



There may be some hope that I can find a new flatmate as two people show interest in my flat. But then there arise my concerns about whether I need to sign a new contract with the landlord if one of the tenants has changed and other things...



It seems so easy to meet people at the city centre. I met a guy who used to work with me as facilitators last year on those workshops for the elderly carers. He asked me if I was off work and I told him I had left my last job and I was jobless. Then he asked me what I was doing now and I just said I was taking a break. He was nice that he didn't try to push me to tell him more about my current life. But I'm really tired of having to explain to some people what I'm doing. Why do some people think you're lazy when you don't look for jobs? Can't I take a break to try to keep myself healthy and do something I want to (e.g. reading, travelling, writing, volunteering)? Why do we all have to keep working and working?

*****

I got my home-made lunch today! (Wanted to save money) 

I got fried tofu, 'choi sum' and egg fried rice with bacon!

My dinner: cheese burger + boiled potatoes + baked beans + broccoli

Not an happy girl

I deleted my post of yesterday because I was wondering if I should post it or not. Anyway here it is...

*****

Not an happy girl today. Felt like crying in the afternoon when I was on my way to the dentist...



Maybe a short conversation on msn with my eldest brother upset me a bit!? His question 'have you found a job yet?' gave me a bit of stress, followed by his comment 'if no job, come back', which made me wonder if I should really go back to HK.. or somewhere else... :(  Nothing seems positive at the moment; or maybe it's just me who doesn't think positive. The class today got a bit more difficult, with some mathematics involved and that made me feel a bit frustrated; had lunch at subway again and chose 'sub of the day' becoz it was cheap! I had an appointment with the dentist in the afternoon and forgetting to bring the certificate for my free dental treatment, together with being unable to leave the class early for going to the dentist put me under stress. I got a bit nervous when seeing the dentist, who was actually a nice, friendly young lady. After the dentist appointment, I went to sports direct to buy a t-shirt for gym - almost tempted to buy a 'little miss trouble' t-shirt but didn't buy it at the end.



Had dinner with someone at GBK tonight. Having nice burgers and chips cheered me up. 





Started feeling the stress of having no income and no job... 



I always remind myself to live for the moment 活在當下, but sometimes life's really a bit too tough for me and I feel helpless and lonely...

*****

My class

My lunch: sub of the day - turkey and ham, not as good as meatball 

I like it!! But it doesn't have my size... 

I like this one too.. 

£1.5 only at Whittard.. 

@GBK: avocado bacon + Jamaican burgers. I love them!  

As usual, elderlyflower + ginger & lemon grass drinks. 

The chips were really nice!

Unhappy girl struggling...

Not an happy girl today. Felt like crying in the afternoon when I was on my way to the dentist...

Maybe a short conversation on msn with my eldest brother upset me a bit!? His question 'have you found a job yet?' gave me a bit of stress, followed by his comment 'if no job, come back', which made me wonder if I should really go back to HK. :(  Nothing seems positive at the moment; or maybe it's just me who doesn't think positive. The class today got a bit more difficult, with some mathematics involved and that made me feel a bit frustrated; had lunch at subway again and chose 'sub of the day' becoz it was cheap! I had an appointment with the dentist in the afternoon and forgetting to bring the certificate for my free dental treatment, together with being unable to leave the class early for going to the dentist put me under stress. I got a bit nervous when seeing the dentist, who was actually a nice, friendly young lady. After the dentist appointment, I went to sports direct to buy a t-shirt for gym - almost tempted to buy a 'little miss trouble' t-shirt but didn't buy it at the end.

Had dinner with someone at GBK tonight. Having nice burgers and chips cheered me up. But somehow still felt a bit sad/depressed. :(

Started feeling the stress of having no income and no job. Does that mean I always have to go back to the life of a poor person? :( Like a cycle - earning money and then having to spend it all and becoming poor before I find a job...

I always remind myself to live for the moment 活在當下, but sometimes life's really a bit too tough for me and I feel helpless and lonely...

my class

My sub of the day! (but not enough to make me feel full)

Oh I like it... but it doesn't have suitable size for me 

 This one looks nice too!

Oh, they cost £1.50 only! 

1/2 Avocado bacon burger + 1/2 Jamaican burger

My favourite chips! And elderlyflower + ginger & lemon grass drinks!

Nothing special but enough to make me happy

Nothing special. A day as a student - class, food shopping & cooking. Simple as that. It'd even have been more wonderful if I can share it with someone. :)

Back to ACCA class today. The tutor who taught us Paper 1 was falling ill and so his supervisor did the teaching today. When I entered the classroom, I thought I had gone to a wrong class; I read the screen for classrooms, I did go into the right class. When I entered the classroom again, I recognized some of my classmates and I asked one of them if it was the paper 1 class! This supervisor tutor did very good teaching, even better than the tutor who initially taught us! I like her teaching style.

 Had meatball sandwiches at Subway for lunch today, since today's sub of the day was meatball and it cost only £2.29!! I read a bit of the fiction 'never let me go' before I got back to the class.. I did a bit of food shopping after class. Considering I have no income now, I should be careful with my spending, but when it comes to food, I still can't be that thrifty - I still try to find the best bargain but at the same time I want to make sure I've got different kinds of food. 

I still have some right upper back pain. Not sure if it's because of the way I sit? 

My meatball sandwiches!

My vegetarian dinner: tofu + mixed vegetables

 Got my ybs card today! :)

made Chinese soup again! I'll try to cook soup twice a week! :)

An accessory given by a service user when she saw me at the city centre. She's now running a wholesale accessory shop!

Appointment with specialist

Got mixed feelings for today. I had an appointment with a Gastro specialist for my stomach problem. I was nervous but also looked forward to it because I really wanted to know what was going wrong with my body. It really doesn't feel good having to suffer different kinds of pain/discomfort every day without knowing what to do to help improve the symptoms. At the moment, the only thing I can do is eat healthily, do exercises, be relaxed and have someone's massage service.

My two good friends 'pak pak' and 'pig pig' accompanied me to that mobile clinical unit in Salford. Initially I was expected to meet them at Piccadilly train station. Who knows it turned out that I met them near where my ex employer organization was! This tells me nothing's perfect - I can't avoid every person that I don't want to see or talk to... It was the first time we went to that mobile clinical unit. I was supposed to be the 'Tom Tom' for pak pak but I didn't do my job well and we went too far away from that clinical unit. Luckily at the end we managed to find it!

My appointment was much quicker than I had expected. Soon after I had reported to the reception, a nurse called me up. Pig Pig accompanied me to the room to see the consultant. The consultant asked me some questions and then asked me to lie down and 'knocked' my tummy with a kind of 'hammer'! He then ordered me to have an ultrasound scan and endoscopy. The first one could be carried out today but the second one had to be arranged by the endoscopy unit! Since I didn't eat anything, I could do ultrasound scan to check if I got any gallstone soon after I had seen the consultant. My first time to have an ultrasound scan! Interesting to see the monitor about my internal body... The lady said things looked normal... It was good to know I didn't have gallstones but still I'm wondering why I have stomach pain and other symptoms. Hopefully the endoscopy can be arranged soon...

After the appointment, I had breakfast with pak pak and pig pig at McDonalds! Felt a bit sorry that they had to wake up early today. They said they didn't get used to being awake so early! :P Then we did a bit of food shopping and we went back to pak pak's house as I had to have a look at pak pak's laptop again! After today, I hope I wouldn't have to deal with the problems of pak pak's laptop. I really feel tired of it... :P

I couldn't wait to go back home after sorting out pak pak's laptop problems, since the weather was getting worse - raining, and I felt cold in pak pak's house. One of the reasons why I'd prefer flats to houses is flats tend to keep more warmth than houses!

The weather this morning...

The weather this afternoon...

Oh my favourite 'sausage & egg muffin', with 'free' porridge given by someone! :)

My dinner tonight... 

Should enjoy life like mum does!

Went to gym before lunch as usual. This was the fifth day I went to gym this week! I was hardworking, wasn't I? :P The gym will be closed next Tuesday and Wednesday and I don't think I'll go to gym tomorrow (Monday) after my appointment with the specialist... Besides the workout at the gym, I also had a workout at home - cleaned the kitchen & shower room and did laundry!

I had a chat with mum on the phone. Most of the time it was she who did the talking, telling me how her life was over the past week. Her life is actually more interesting and lively than mine - she went to Jackie Cheung's concert last night; she yum cha with my aunts and uncles for Mother's Day; she's gonna go to Guang Zhou for 3 days with friends in early July. She does enjoy life much more than I do here! I should ask myself why I can't enjoy life as mum does?

Getting nervous now about tomorrow's appointment at the NHS Clinical & Treatment Services. Hopefully everything will go well!

My lunch: pasta with chicken & 'choi sum' with soup leftover

My dinner: burger + mixed vegetables

The burger had scrumbled egg & cheese!! Very special; even McDonalds don't have it! :P

Depressing day

'How to keep positive when everything seems to go against you?' That's the question I asked myself before I started feeling sick in January. The question still comes to my mind from time to time and I still have no answer to that. Struggling all the time. Feel like life sucks. :( Today was one of the days when I feel that way.

Today as usual I first went to the gym before lunch. Did 30 minutes only as I didn't feel I had energy. Then I went to McDonalds for lunch. Had McChicken sandwich with fries. Disappointed when I found there was no sticker on the bag of my chips! :( The elderly 'pak pak' got a sticker on his and I really wanted to ask him if he could give it to me! But looked like he was also interested in the sticker! The size of the fries was also much smaller. :(

I then went to Starbucks with my netbook baby for a cup of hot chocolate. Did a bit of reading before I started revising an anthology for the research project for my ex employer. Around 5 p.m. I went back home looking forward to the visit by someone... Had nice dinner with someone at a Korean restaurant. Yummy yummy.

After I had gone back home, I received a call from the elderly 'pak pak' who I had helped for his computer problem two days ago. He said there was a problem with his laptop. I wanted to help but I wasn't in the mood to work out his problem. :(

Then my flatmate and her boyfriend... I found the lights of the kitchen and bathroom were turned on but obviously no one was in those places. And someone has been staying over in the flat for many nights. I don't mind if I have been told but no one told me anything about it. It's as if someone is living in this place! :( No respect, no communication, no consideration.. How come life has become so stressful?

 My netbook baby

Yummy fish!

Beef stone rice! 

Very nice noodles!